Tulpa.info - tulpa-discussion

so you think he was there most of your life?

12:28 AM

from childhood?

12:28 AM

that is the case with me..I was created in my hosts childhood

cleansed

from childhood?

Probably He acts a lot like i did when i was around 3 years old, so i think he might've been split off around 4 or 5 when i stopped being so happy and started being anxious

I'm surprised you can remember how you acted when you were 3?

I clearly remember it

12:30 AM

There are blank spots though; not sure if that's trauma or just growing up

12:31 AM

But my mom also noted that he acts like that so

sometimes blank spots are where alters take over

12:31 AM

memory problems is huge with mpd

12:32 AM

basically I am a work in progress

12:32 AM

I need the host for everything

cleansed

sometimes blank spots are where alters take over

That could be it I don't seem to experience amnesia between him at this point but it might've been a problem at some point I have a lot of experiences that i should remember and definitely don't though so maybe i have another alter with amnesia between them Idk, i'm just gonna figure it out as i discover things

to us the goal is to unravel from where we have come to

12:32 AM

to see where we are at

12:33 AM

because its all messed up

12:33 AM

trying to restore order by learning how to cooperate

Yeah It's hard to have a childhood that causes you to split There's a lot to unpack

its brutal..once your heart is broken like that

12:33 AM

only God can fix it

Therapists can help

Yes and hopefully the person will follow the therapists advice

12:34 AM

we are working on healing

12:35 AM

ideally to reintegrate..spiritually to allow me to depart if that is what is called for

12:35 AM

the soul has a gender

12:35 AM

i am a female soul part

12:35 AM

the host has a male soul

cleansed

ideally to reintegrate..spiritually to allow me to depart if that is what is called for

Fair enough Idk if i want to fuse back with eishi yet but i def need better integration or something so we can work together

cleansed

the host has a male soul

Yeah a lot of the time alters can have different genders from the host Thats the case with me Eishi is a boy; i'm nonbinary

in my case i experience gender spiritually

12:36 AM

i am a female spirit

12:37 AM

but not independent i was made from the host

12:37 AM

from his soul

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like eve from adam

I've never really thought about gender spiritually before I mean, i've read a fair amount about the polarity of the god and the goddess, and the traits they both provide and stuff But i never thought about it beyond that

well God is Father..he is the Father of spirits

12:38 AM

but our spirits have genders

12:39 AM

because we are male and female

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male and female have to do with biology and identity

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who you really are spiritually

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basically..you start out the gender you are born as..then things can happen spiritually to change that

12:40 AM

based on childhood sexual abuse and ritual satanic abuse especially

I wasn't abused those ways tmk and i still turned out trans

well its one thing that can cause it

12:40 AM

its causing mpd

12:41 AM

and mpd is basically trans

12:41 AM

right?

12:41 AM

abuse created mpd

12:41 AM

in my life

cleansed

and mpd is basically trans

Not sure what you mean by that

well the host was abused and that created me

12:42 AM

he was a male soul at first

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and after the abuse

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a male soul with a female part of his soul

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the abuse caused it..that makes him trans

12:42 AM

so its one way trans can be created

Oh Yeah

there are other ways people become trans of course

It can happen without abuse though Yeah (edited)

yes

12:43 AM

it can

12:43 AM

the host is trans against his will

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but he is okay with it

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he accepts it as part of Gods plan

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Its actually a path to healing

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with Gods help

I think i was trans before i got trauma Since i always felt this way But i suppose it depends on the person

well the host had a repressed memory

12:44 AM

its very possible you have those

12:44 AM

since you mentioned having memory problems

Probably There were a few things i remembered in the past 4 or so years that i didn't remember before, so maybe i'll uncover some more

I will say a prayer for you

Thank you

There are things that are happening in the spiritual realm that everyone should be aware of

12:45 AM

but not many are

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i encourage you to seek God for help

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Jesus can help you with this

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He is helping me

I've never really felt connected to jesus, but i do have other sources of spirituality

the thing about the name of Jesus is that it has the authority in the spiritual realm

12:47 AM

because he defeated the devil

12:47 AM

the devil knows how to program souls

12:47 AM

jesus knows how to deprogram them

I never really thought about it that way

he likes to repurpose souls and give them new destinies

12:48 AM

the devils are afraid of Jesus

12:49 AM

im learning a lot and growing..i am feeling kind of happy today. its been a good day

That's good

:))

We had a good day too Eishi played some minecraft, then i did some stuff on my computer later My mom ordered chicken strips for supper

sounds good..im getting kind of hungry myself

It's good to stay nourished I hope you can get something good to eat

thanks

Yeah I am going to go take care now Kei

You take care too

God bless

Probably He acts a lot like i did when i was around 3 years old, so i think he might've been split off around 4 or 5 when i stopped being so happy and started being anxious

@Kei Wendt - jump it is not unusual for any person - a singlet or plural - to resiscover that what they were like in childhood is still there in their mind. Children are innocent, happy, nom-judgemental, playful, creative etc. Sometimes those qualities can feel like they were taken off by an experience - a judgemental opinion from the parent, or friends. But those qualities are never lost. You can reconnect to those qualities by healing the experiences that made those qualities blocked from you. When that happens, you do fee and act as you did in childhood. Your headmate who disowns your past can also find themself in this situation, as bevause of disowning your buography they are not affected by the effects of those events. There is no reason to see that through the lens of plurality, it will only block you from actual healing and you reconnecting from that innocent and good part of yourself

9:53 AM

the above is also for @cleansed

9:57 AM

but our spirits have genders

@cleansed - jump i don’t know how you understand souls, but this is the first time i saw someone attributing gender to spirit. Gender is a purely identity related trait, which is why you could experience the gender changing due to trauma, because identity is affected by the events you experience all the time. Do you equal identity with spirit?

only God can fix it

@cleansed - jump i’ve been treated for did, went quite far with it… no god was involved